A.M.C.: Astro Marine Corps
Sideways scrolling shooter where you blast aliens and walk to the end. Looks bad and plays bad.
Alone in the dark 3
Explore more deserted places that always turn up not be deserted at all. This time in a western ghost town.
Amnesia: Rebirth
The stumble around in the dark, find incendiary devices and cry in the corner until the darkness goes away is not enough gameplay. I tried to play for a while before i switched over to adventure Mode. Story and puzzles was both meh so really nothing for me in this game.
An Elder Scrolls Legend: Battlespire
A Elder Scolls game set inside the Battlespire, a magic academy that train battlemages. Run around and fight the monsters and the game controls. Don't like the combat at all. The worst enemy is the game physics system. Even the smallest edge can confuse it and make you die like you jumped from 10k feet to the ground.
Arma 3
Time to give up on Bohemia Interactive. Operation Flashpoint was fun but i do not wish to play the same game fourteen years later with the same bugs.
Arx Fatalis
This is a game that try to be Ultima Underworld and fails. Linear with no dialoge options and on top of that a user interface that makes less sense then the one in System Shock. The magic system looks fun until you try to use it. You have to draw runes with the mouse to cast spells and it feels like a bad ipad game ten years before anyone know what a ipad was. All i really needed to use was the fireball spell that worked well is the Win button in all combat scenarios. And that was a good thing as the combat was not fun anyway.
Assassin's Creed 3
More stealth kills and this time in the New World. I found the setting boring as I do not care about some old houses in Boston. So boring in fact that i gave up the game.
Assassin's Creed IV: Black Flag
This could be a nice pirate game. Unfortunately someone had to force assassins creed into it. No fun historical places to visit, play as a whiny knob and a enjoy a cast of pirates that spend most of the time wasting air. If I have to play another tail a character mission I will assassinate myself. Pirates of Nightmares would have been a better game.
Assassins Creed Syndicate
I think the writer had seen Gangs of New York a bit to many times. Not much i enjoyed in this game. Tiresome missions and side quests. Feels like they reused the boss fight from Unity.
Battlefield 4
After a step up in Battlefield 3 the single player is back at worthless levels again. So bad in fact that the thing that i compare this game to is Aliens Colonial marines. I'm running around with my annoying squad and i can't count the number of times i wished i could just shoot them and play alone. This game must have been written by writers of the retard school of 'everything is a conflict' and the team members can not say two words to each other without screaming about it. They are also window dressing as they can not be killed and are ignored by the enemy. So when i sneak around in the level they are standing beside the tank I’m trying to avoid. Immersion gets it in the face in this game. One of the few positive things with the single player was that it only crashed on me one time in the seven hours it took to play it. Multiplayer is more unstable and crashes and other bugs are not uncommon. Battlefield 4 feels and plays as Battlefield 3 so it is better to just play Battlefield 3 some more.
Black Viper
The world is destroyed in a nuclear war and you drive from town to town on your motorcycle to save it. Not sure how it will be saved but on the way you need to shoot down all these cars and other motorcycles that get in your way. Real ugly game here that really do not work at all.
Call of Duty: Ghosts
So time to play COD: Ghosts. Only started by the story is already in WTF mode. #codghosts . So lets run after a guy. This is a #asswatchsim
And a dog to. Well i'm not a dog person, i prefer cats so i will not care when it dies. Your simple mind tricks do not work on me developers 'Sounds like trouble'. And so the military lingo bingo starts again. #codghosts Omgz i can play as a dog. I call next ge... ... ohh nope. Back to door breaching. My misstake, still last last gen. #codghosts 'Looks like they went this way'. You don't say? They did go the only possible way in this straight corridor world? #codghosts 'Remember, move slow and do exactly what the level designer scripted for you. Do not try to think outside the box' #codghosts 'Get to the chopper' *sigh* #CODGhosts This drone thing could be made fun but it's so scripted it feels pointless. And now my save is stuck so i need to replay the mission 'Welcome to the ghosts', 'we finish the mission'. A flooded city is nice place to fight in. I will hum the jaws theme as i sneak attack Falling building and running after a guy. Yep still playing #CODGhosts. And there was the helicopter section. And it fails to impress also. Nothing is that good with this game. #codghosts 'stay frosty'. Think they hit all the one liners in this game. Ohh and 'wait for it...' to, nice. #CODGhosts No need for the rescure boats in the end of Atlas falls. All the innocent people on that rig died in a sea of flamming oil. #CODGhosts Omgz, water level now. Must be time for that next gen Fish AI. Every gamedev team should have a Fishy AI Programmer position. #CODGhosts So the factory builds space weapons and tanks one room apart. Even bond villains would point out the flaws in this design. #CODGhosts Checkmate, the end, fin, extra credits for tacky piece of shit ending also. I hate this game. #CODGhosts
Carmageddon: Splat pack
Expansion for Carmageddon. Not that good as the first one as they tried to make the levels a bit more weird Spending two minutes to get back up from the water after falling down does not improve the game. The focus should be on ramming into each other at high speed instead of trying to find each other.
City Defence
In this game you have two defense towers and you select the one to shoot from with the mouse buttons. The goal is to shoot down the incoming missiles so they don?t destroy any of your towns. It all goes on wave after wave and each one is a little faster. Not a fun game at all really :(.
Close to the Sun
Search for your sister in a giant ship owned by Nikola Tesla. The search is done by walking, reading notes you find and getting chased a few times. Steams, tesla coils and a story that don't go anywhere worth caring about.
Darksiders
Take the role as War, one of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. The world has ended and you run around and kill of angels and daemons that gets in your way.
Deus Ex: Human Revolution
So i played this game and put in the the score. Forgot to write the text for the review. I played it for 24 hours and got achievement for completing it. No memory of what i did in it all. With that score i guess i hooked up my mind to the grid and wiped myself.
Duke Nukem Forever
Fist-person shooter that is overall really bad. The best part is when one is hit by the Shrink ray. Some levels looks like they where made in 2000 and has not been updated since.
Excalibur 2555 AD
The sword Excalibur have been stolen and you travel to the future to save it.
Final Fantasy 13
Role-playing game where the roles are set and the playing takes care of itself. The only thing left is to follow the story and read every note to try to understand what is going on. All the characters overact like the voice actor had a gun to his head so it get's a bit tiresome after a while. The final nail for me was the combat. So repetitive and boring I gave it all up. So youtube for the rest of the story then.
Firewatch
Take a job as a fire lookout. Look out the window of your tower, talk to another ranger over radio and walk. The 4 hours playtime would be 8 hours if the run button was removed. The short clip shows a summary of all the things you get to do in the game. But it's mostly walking. I think it's time for me to give up on walking simulators. I can't handle more slow paced walking, looking at things and suffer another nothingburger story. The only upside is that they are short and give game journalists more time writing another is video games art essay/review.
Forsaken
Set in a distant future where Earth is condemned and mercenaries now raid the dead planet. Battle robots left behind and other mercenaries. Linear levels, lacklustre enemies and weapons makes me prefer to play Descent instead.
Fracture
Shooter where you can manipulate the ground. By raising it a few meter up or down. I was bored before the the tutorial section ended.
Halo: Combat Evolved
First-person shooter where you drive and walk around in the same areas over and over again and shoot the same strange little gnome like creatures. You take the role of a super soldier called Master Chief that after a desperate escape from evil aliens fall out of hyperspace beside the a mystical ring in space, the Halo. The aliens with the name of The Coventant also drop by and then it turns into a minor war on and about the control of the Halo and to find out what it does.
Gameplay is like in most other first-person shooter but this game was the one that really get that regenerating shield/health thing stated where you simply take cover for a while to recharge it.
Haze
Play as a soldier fighting for the Mantel cooperation while high on drugs. The drug Nectar gives you improved performance in the game and later on in the game you learn that it also makes you ignore all the horrible things you have done. Later on you switch side and fight against your former friends and also get a chance to do all the vehicle sections and other things any generic shooter contains. The land carrier was the only fun idea but it's wasted like most things in this game.
Hidden & Dangerous
Fun soldier game in WW2 and also winner of most crashes / hour award. Looks like the only tested to first levels in the game as the game crash more and more at the end. The gameplay was cool anyway with fun and varied levels.
I Am Alive
So I hated this game. I read that it would take five hours to complete and that's six hours to long.
Kick Off
Top down football game. Why do i play all these sports game, i hate them all :|.
Kid Pool
Top down game that has no options, no good control system and they physics on the balls are bad to.
King's Quest: Quest for the Crown
Adventure game where you explore the fantasy world of Daventry to collect three lost treasures to become the next king.
Leisure Suit Larry: In the Land of the Lounge Lizards
Enjoy the glorious life of Larry and enter commands to get him to move forward in life.
Lotus Turbo Challenge 2
Arcade driving where you try to complete each track before the time runs out to get to the next.
Mace Griffin Bounty Hunter
First person shooter and space game mixed into one. You do mission and travel between them by flying your spaceship and fighting your way to the mission areas. Both have been done better in other game and this mix makes them both seem like only half done
Marine Sharpshooter 3
Game from 2007 that looks like a been sent by a time machine from before 2000.
Megaball
Ball and paddle game where you destroy blocks at top of screen. Something feel off with the ball/paddle in this game and the power-ups are boring.
Megarace
Most fun part in this game is the game host Lance and the graphics when you select your car and that say everything you need to know about the level of fun in this game.
Men of valor
Shooter set in the Vietnam war. Shoot things, reload, shoot things, get lost among the foilage and shoot some more.
Minecraft
Punch blocks, place blocks and build things. Fun to play around for a while but it gets old really fast and there is not enough for it to last.
NAM
First-person shooter set during the Vietnam War. Techology was moving fast in 98 and this game was horrible outdated when released. Duke nukem still works in 2020 but it played to the strengths of the build engine, not fighting against it.
Nitro
This was not fun. I set my own goal that I would play until I managed to avoid getting in last place once. Never been so happy to see one of the AI cars get stuck on a wall.
Observer
Take on the role of a detective that hack peoples brain in a cyberpunk setting. Walking simulator with a few vision modes to solve puzzles and mind hacking to walk around inside the minds of people. My feeling for this game can best me summarized by the Wtf is this Joe Pesci meme.
OutRun
Race along the five stages in a Ferrari and select the path to take at the end of each stage. No driving skill so i never got to the final stage.
Pac-Mania
Eat the dot's and stay away from the ghosts. You can also jump to avoid the ghosts and with four levels this should make a great game if not for the fact that pac-man games are sad and dull whatever they contain.
Pinball Wizard
Pinball games are really not my thing. I know some people wish to have a pinball machine at home but i think it is painful enough to have one on the computer. This is one of the first Amiga pinball games, from 1987 and there is not much to enjoy in this game. One board only and large part of the screen is wasted on a stupid score and settings display. The gameplay do not work that well when the ball bounce around like a cube made out of tar.
Punch-Out
Boxing game where you punch people in the face as much as you can. You work your way up the ladder to the final fight like in any sports game of this type and click on the button at random and hope for the best. Sport games are funless.
Quake 4
The story goes on from Quake 2 and this game takes ideas from Halo, Starship troopers and Half-Life and it does not go that well. You play another space marine this time and you have to fight of new Makron that they Strogg has created. Mostly I found the gameplay tiresome and I hate games that have a 'jump past three traps in a row' section. There is a part in the story when the player get put inside a machine to turn him in a Strogg and it was fun to see but it was not used well by the story.
Rambo 3
Based in the Epic Rambo movie and that makes the game as good as one would expect. Take three scenes from the movie and make it into subgames so here we walk inside and shoot, then outside and shoot and finally we drive a tank an shoot. One more of these types of games and i will shoot myself.
Risen
Risen is boring. It has some positive elements like some nice vistas and some bad like the combat system but hours in the game i was tired of playing it. It never gets anywhere. Even the dialogue drags on without any of the characters saying anything i care about.
Silent Hunter V: Battle of the Atlantic
The main selling point for this game is the ability to walk inside and outside on the submarine. It's a nice function but it does not add anything to the gameplay. Using the bad controls to walk around and talk to your stupid crew with a single voice line each only makes you hate them. I will not even talk about the user interface, a oversimplified mess that takes away all the enjoyment of the simulation. Please sink this game to crush depth as soon as possible.
Sniper: Art of victory
Game that try to be Sniper Elite but fails. Only good thing about the game is that it is short. Other then that the game has bad collision with the player getting stuck, the ai is worthless and stupid mini cutscene destroy the flow of the game multiple times per level.
Spec Ops: The Line
Third-person shooter set in Dubai. Destructive sandstorms have ruined the city and the player takes the role of a small delta team that go in to find out what did go wrong with the evacuation of the city. Some of the environments is nice but everything else is below average. The story is formed by running from one badly designed game section to the next and getting a forklift of cut scenes in the face in between. It's not well done and one can see the plot points two levels before it happens. I really feel like the developers gave up on making the gameplay solid and added a thin layer of story instead. Then they throw down the art card and game critics then soiled themselves in a quest to use long words to describe how deep the game is.
It's not, it should been left under the sand to die in 2010.
Spore
The developers made a cool way to build creatures and then they needed to build a game around it to not get fired. That is the way I picture the the whole development process for spore. This game is like five really shitty games linked one after the other and none of them is any fun.
Super Mario Bros
Now to get my gamer license revoked. I do not like this game. Walk and jump. It's boring.
The Karate Kid: Part II - The Computer Game
Fighting game based on the movie where you simple participate in five fights based on scenes from the movie. Also contain two small mini games where you try to break ice blocks or catch flies with chopstick. Game is so bad it's make more sense to try to break the game discs instead.
The Westport Independent
Play as a editor in chief of a newspaper and choose what to publish. Every week I supported the democratically elected Loyalist Party, vilified the rebels and praised the great leader. Still, in the end everyone loved me. The idea of this game is much better then it's execution.
The Wheel of Time
Take on the role of one of the Aes Sedai from the wheel of time book series. Instead of spells Ter'Angreal artifacts are used so you can find them and consume them in the game. Think guns, ammo and power ups. Long cut-scenes that tell the story filled with people slow to get to the point. Gameplay is bit on repeat with the same few spells for combat.
Tintin on the moon
Guide Tintin to the moon by avoiding asteroids, putting out fires, landing and other things. Not that fun really..
Tom Clancy's Ghost Recon: Future Soldier
Ghost Recon used to be cool, like Rainbow Six but today they are sad shadows of what they used to be. This version is a generic on the rails cover-based shooter. Some mission demands that you do not alert anyone and for them you just order around your team mates to kill everyone. Not that hard as they are invisible to the enemy and can shoot straight trough walls. There is no tactical shooter element left in this game.
Tom Clancy's Rainbow Six: Lockdown
Rainbow six arcade style and the the nickname Rainbow Six: Letdown fits it well.
Train Simulator 2013
Connect the wagons and drive your train along the landscape. Steam locomotives are nice as always but there is not much to do besides moving your camera around as you zip along the rail. So... gets boring really fast.
Ultima II: The Revenge of the Enchantress
This is a grind style of game and to move forward in the game you need gold and you get it from killing things. You use the gold to buy better stats so you can buy better weapons and armor. With it you can kill things faster so you buy food and hit points. You keep killing things until you finally get a boat. Not that it change the game, but now you can use the Fire key instead of the Attack key for killing things. That's the amount of fun this game contains.
Ultima III: Exodus
Similar gameplay to Ultima 2 but three times the grid. Kill, loot, weapons, stats, repeat. Boss defeated by punched cards is a first.
Unreal II: The Awakening
The only fun thing in this game is your half nude female first officer and it is not a good thing in a game. In short it all feels like a first-person shooter like all the others with the stupid soldiers you have to work with on a level or two so they can say they have great artificial intelligence in the game and your stupid ship mates that are so clich? that you almost throw up. When some of your team mates finally drop dead you do not miss them but rather wish you could walk up and hug the monsters for killing them.
Unreal: Return to Na Pali
Expansion to unreal were we get to learn what happened to our hero after the events in unreal. Not that epic really :(.
Warm Up
Top-down racing game based on Formula 1. Go around the track until you get tired off it, crash into the wall and try to find something better to play.
What Remains of Edith Finch
Walking simulator that have some fun ideas how they present the story but the story is to weak for me to care. No movie for this one as the game is really short and anything would spoil something.
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Note about Movies: None of the Youtube movies that i link to are made by me and i include them only to give you a chance to see what the game looks like. Only the text and the smiley score act as my review of the game  .
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